Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
