So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
