Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
