8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Randomize
