I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Randomize
