Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
