Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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