please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
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