Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
