i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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