At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
