BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
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