i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
