He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
