So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
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