you're like a bully in the Christmas story
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
