I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
