some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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