how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Randomize
