what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
