i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
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