Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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