I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
