Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
‎"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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