You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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