how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
