first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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