Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Randomize
