Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
