well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
