My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
is wine microwaveable?
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Randomize
