I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
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