Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
