she looked like the bat from fern gully.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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