Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
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