i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
