4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
