he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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