So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
