New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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