I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
