the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
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