; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
