Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Randomize
