yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
