1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Randomize
