Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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