yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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