mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Randomize
