Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize